The Retribution of My Sophia

How easy is it to explain to people that the collective consciousness of their reality is cancerous and filled with mental and spiritual parasites? You have to be the ‘bad’ guy who dares to speak the ugly truth that no one wants to hear. You have to be the shadow and the fool who is trying to walk between polarities and balance on the rope that connects the two pillars and you have to be ready to fall by the left or by the right wind and then stand up again and go through the same process until you will accomplish your task and you may even become obsessed with your mission and walk between reason and madness.

What choices do you have if you reach this level to see beyond the polarity and become the Apollo/Α-πόλων (beyond the poles) and the Sun that brings the light to the blind?

If you reach this level you will understand that you only have two choices; one is to go back to the cave and try to work through the shadows that enslave the minds of people and manifest a polarization within the lower densities (yin) on which you can build your fortress to be able to defend and protect your light within darkness as the Gnostics (who are the ascended masters) did, or you can just forget about it and look after your self and become selfish by choosing detachment and self preservation. The circumstances of my life left me with no other choice than to walk the left path and choose the left door as Neo did when he met the architect of ‘The Matrix’ movie who gave him these choices, to either detach and walk the right path to save Zion (right pillar), or choose the left door and go back to save his Trinity (left pillar). This is the pattern which no one can escape from at this level in this game.

What is more important, to save the one you love and who gives meaning (Ennoia) to your existence or leave behind your wife and your family as Buddha did, and climb a mountain to attain enlightenment?

Some would perceive this differently but for me the equation goes like this and it is very simple: I would never leave my Sophia behind, even if I would have to fight for her until my last breath and anything less than this would be cowardly and selfish… So some choose the path of the ‘damned’ because they need her and they need their own Helen just as Simon the Magus did who was one of the many victims of the lunatics that took over the church and created this monstrosity we know as Christendom.



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Sophia is the shakti (empowerment force) of Logos who is MARDUK = 408 = AMUN RA who is Zeus while Simon the Magus claimed to be Zeus.

I searched for my Helen everywhere, even in the depths of abyss, where I had to fight with armies of demons and bleed an ocean of emotional blood. Even when I began losing hope, I knew that she was somewhere in this universe looking for me too and even when I gave up on myself, I couldn’t give up on her. I could never accept that there is no meaning (Ennoia) in my universe and in reality no one does, even if they are  freezing in the depths of the abyss. We all search for her even when we don’t admit it. We all search for Ennoia (meaning) and for wisdom (Sophia) and she is the most valuable treasure that anyone could have and those that cannot even get close to her are just trying to enslave her in their meaningless worlds because of jealousy.

“Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace.”

-Proverbs 3:13-18

It hurts to think and it hurts more to speak about how people mistreated her, even some who wrongly called themselves philosophers were trying to rape her and use her for their own pleasure and even sell her to their audience, but none of them could really have her; they were ‘playing’ with her body and with her outer self but her soul remained pure, because not even one of them could unlock her mysteries and reveal her divine essence. Many times I have taken it personally when all of these ‘intelligent’ people were attempting to rape her in front of my eyes and I was angry, I was very angry, and I wanted to fight for her and protect her and I did everything I could to free her from the lower densities and raise her back to her throne as the Holy Mother of All and make them pay for what they did and kneel in front of her and so I begun building my fortress in the dark, waiting for the right time to strike and take down their meaningless and worthless realities and this is how my journey into the darkness begun.

It is then, when I began to understand the meaning of occultism which is a game created just for her. Occultism is a game created by the friends of my Helen in order to protect her from the dogs and the pigs. It was a great relief for me when I discovered that my Helen had so many friends in high places that were ready to fight for her.

“Do not give to dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.”

-Matthew 7:6

I began to realize that this game was created by the gods for two main reasons:

1) To protect the innocent and poor people from the mental masturbators and spiritual pimps by manifesting an artificial polarity of the left and the right where the good people would be under the protection of the right hand of our father.

2) To harvest the wise that are truly worthy of being initiated into the mysteries of my Helen and to give to them the Morning Star and the keys of the kingdom.

“’And he who overcomes, and he who keeps My deeds until the end, to him I will give authority over the nations; and he shall rule them with a rod of iron, as the vessels of the potter are broken to pieces, as I also have received authority from My Father; and I will give him the morning star.”

-Revelation 2:26-28

So someone could ask how the following applies to my thinking:

“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.”

– Matthew 25:41

Well this is the best part because those who are trying to exploit my Helen and enslave her in the lower densities are becoming polarized in the left side and they are getting lost in their meaningless illusions that we created for them in the darkness where they will have to kneel and kiss her feet in order to find the meaning to their meaningless existence while they will also have to deal with the dragon fire of the right pillar.

So how you can trace the polarization of the left pillar in our density and free Sophia from her enslavers? You can trace the people that are trying pass everything through their left brain hemisphere while because of some mental (yin) polarization, they reject their spiritual nature. Materialism is by default polarization within the lower densities and in a healthy world should be forbidden by law. Matter is also spirit because everything is mental energy of some density and so the spirit is also matter of higher density and we can also say that matter is spirit of lower density. Everything is energy of some density and matter is sold energy and so my Sophia, which descended from the higher densities into our world, could never be just matter.

A materialist should never, for any reason, be called a philosopher (“Lover of Sophia”). This is a great insult for the real philosophers and a direct attack to my Sophia. All of this wasted mental energy to prove that we are just matter should be burned in fire and be forgotten about. It would make more sense to me if we distinguish the friends of my Sophia and the real philosophers from the mental masturbators so that they may understand that the meaning of our existence was never to gain mental power in the lower densities and build a strong polarization within matter (lower ego) but to evolve spiritually into higher densities.

The above is easy for anyone to understand and even a Christian could agree with what I am saying about materialism. A Christian who is attached to the church and her power over the lower densities is just replacing my Sophia with rocks, fear and mental spasms of delusional and spiritually castrated people who could never know her or even get close to her because they did everything they could to kill her and erase her from our memories in order to replace her with their fake male authority when they rejected Mary Magdalene and even before of this when they rejected the Shekinah and they tried to hide her in their monstrous constructions where they called her the Holy Ghost in order to use her energy for their own reasons which were to enslave the minds of people into their false matrix.

These people are spiritual pimps who raised themselves up as gods in the place of the real gods and who raped my Sophia in the dungeons of their demonic castle in order to use her energy to empower their false edifices in the lower densities. The church manifested a very strong polarization on the LEFT side and it is like a mental sickness. They can, of course, have faith and it is good to believe in the higher densities while they cannot reach them but it is wrong for them to speak and project a polarization through their ego in the lower densities about issues that they have no idea about while they were so incompetent to deal with philosophy where they CURSED philosophy and Plato and in reality EVERYONE that love HER. How do these people even DARE to think that this sickness can be the answer to the materialism that THEY empowered as no one else through the mental/left/yin polarization they enforced for their own reasons and their own power in the lower densities?

They hunted us and they slaughtered us and they burned us at the stake because we loved HER and these people have the audacity to claim that they serve the will of the higher densities (the will of God) !!! The simple and humble people that are not projecting their polarization onto others are under the protection of the right hand of our father and the rest who try to enforce their lower perceptions and pretend to be spiritual masters and the holders of the truth are those that are on the left side of our father and there is no fake god that can protect them from their own reality. We all have the choice to either choose detachment and silence and walk the right hand path of mysticism or to walk the left hand path of danger and fight for her and her salvation from the dogs and the pigs of the left side who try to exploit her and use her because they are not men enough to LOVE her.

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I was sent forth from the power,
and I have come to those who reflect upon me,
and I have been found among those who seek after me.
Look upon me, you who reflect upon me,
and you hearers, hear me.
You who are waiting for me, take me to yourselves.
And do not banish me from your sight.
And do not make your voice hate me, nor your hearing.
Do not be ignorant of me anywhere or any time. Be on your guard!
Do not be ignorant of me.

For I am the first and the last.
I am the honored one and the scorned one.
I am the whore and the holy one.
I am the wife and the virgin.
I am and the daughter.
I am the members of my mother.
I am the barren one
and many are her sons.
I am she whose wedding is great,
and I have not taken a husband.
I am the midwife and she who does not bear.
I am the solace of my labor pains.
I am the bride and the bridegroom,
and it is my husband who begot me.
I am the mother of my father
and the sister of my husband
and he is my offspring.
I am the slave of him who prepared me.
I am the ruler of my offspring.
But he is the one who begot me before the time on a birthday.
And he is my offspring in (due) time,
and my power is from him.
I am the staff of his power in his youth,
and he is the rod of my old age.
And whatever he wills happens to me.
I am the silence that is incomprehensible
and the idea whose remembrance is frequent.
I am the voice whose sound is manifold
and the word whose appearance is multiple.
I am the utterance of my name.

Why, you who hate me, do you love me,
and hate those who love me?
You who deny me, confess me,
and you who confess me, deny me.
You who tell the truth about me, lie about me,
and you who have lied about me, tell the truth about me.
You who know me, be ignorant of me,
and those who have not known me, let them know me.

For I am knowledge and ignorance.
I am shame and boldness.
I am shameless; I am ashamed.
I am strength and I am fear.
I am war and peace.
Give heed to me.

I am the one who is disgraced and the great one.
Give heed to my poverty and my wealth.
Do not be arrogant to me when I am cast out upon the earth,
and you will find me in those that are to come.
And do not look upon me on the dung-heap
nor go and leave me cast out,
and you will find me in the kingdoms.
And do not look upon me when I am cast out among those who
are disgraced and in the least places,
nor laugh at me.
And do not cast me out among those who are slain in violence.

But I, I am compassionate and I am cruel.
Be on your guard!

Do not hate my obedience
and do not love my self-control.
In my weakness, do not forsake me,
and do not be afraid of my power.

For why do you despise my fear
and curse my pride?
But I am she who exists in all fears
and strength in trembling.
I am she who is weak,
and I am well in a pleasant place.
I am senseless and I am wise.

Why have you hated me in your counsels?
For I shall be silent among those who are silent,
and I shall appear and speak,

Why then have you hated me, you Greeks?
Because I am a barbarian among the barbarians?
For I am the wisdom of the Greeks
and the knowledge of the barbarians.
I am the judgement of the Greeks and of the barbarians.
I am the one whose image is great in Egypt
and the one who has no image among the barbarians.
I am the one who has been hated everywhere
and who has been loved everywhere.
I am the one whom they call Life,
and you have called Death.
I am the one whom they call Law,
and you have called Lawlessness.
I am the one whom you have pursued,
and I am the one whom you have seized.
I am the one whom you have scattered,
and you have gathered me together.
I am the one before whom you have been ashamed,
and you have been shameless to me.
I am she who does not keep festival,
and I am she whose festivals are many.

I, I am godless,
and I am the one whose God is great.
I am the one whom you have reflected upon,
and you have scorned me.
I am unlearned,
and they learn from me.
I am the one that you have despised,
and you reflect upon me.
I am the one whom you have hidden from,
and you appear to me.
But whenever you hide yourselves,
I myself will appear.
For whenever you appear,
I myself will hide from you.

Those who have […] to it […] senselessly […].
Take me [… understanding] from grief.
and take me to yourselves from understanding and grief.
And take me to yourselves from places that are ugly and in ruin,
and rob from those which are good even though in ugliness.
Out of shame, take me to yourselves shamelessly;
and out of shamelessness and shame,
upbraid my members in yourselves.
And come forward to me, you who know me
and you who know my members,
and establish the great ones among the small first creatures.
Come forward to childhood,
and do not despise it because it is small and it is little.
And do not turn away greatnesses in some parts from the smallnesses,
for the smallnesses are known from the greatnesses.

Why do you curse me and honor me?
You have wounded and you have had mercy.
Do not separate me from the first ones whom you have known.
And do not cast anyone out nor turn anyone away
[…] turn you away and [… know] him not.
What is mine […].
I know the first ones and those after them know me.
But I am the mind of […] and the rest of […].
I am the knowledge of my inquiry,
and the finding of those who seek after me,
and the command of those who ask of me,
and the power of the powers in my knowledge
of the angels, who have been sent at my word,
and of gods in their seasons by my counsel,
and of spirits of every man who exists with me,
and of women who dwell within me.
I am the one who is honored, and who is praised,
and who is despised scornfully.
I am peace,
and war has come because of me.
And I am an alien and a citizen.

I am the substance and the one who has no substance.
Those who are without association with me are ignorant of me,
and those who are in my substance are the ones who know me.
Those who are close to me have been ignorant of me,
and those who are far away from me are the ones who have known me.
On the day when I am close to you, you are far away from me,
and on the day when I am far away from you, I am close to you.

[I am …] within.
[I am …] of the natures.
I am […] of the creation of the spirits.
[…] request of the souls.
I am control and the uncontrollable.
I am the union and the dissolution.
I am the abiding and I am the dissolution.
I am the one below,
and they come up to me.
I am the judgment and the acquittal.
I, I am sinless,
and the root of sin derives from me.
I am lust in (outward) appearance,
and interior self-control exists within me.
I am the hearing which is attainable to everyone
and the speech which cannot be grasped.
I am a mute who does not speak,
and great is my multitude of words.
Hear me in gentleness, and learn of me in roughness.
I am she who cries out,
and I am cast forth upon the face of the earth.
I prepare the bread and my mind within.
I am the knowledge of my name.
I am the one who cries out,
and I listen.
I appear and […] walk in […] seal of my […].
I am […] the defense […].
I am the one who is called Truth
and iniquity […].

You honor me […] and you whisper against me.
You who are vanquished, judge them (who vanquish you)
before they give judgment against you,
because the judge and partiality exist in you.
If you are condemned by this one, who will acquit you?
Or, if you are acquitted by him, who will be able to detain you?
For what is inside of you is what is outside of you,
and the one who fashions you on the outside
is the one who shaped the inside of you.
And what you see outside of you, you see inside of you;
it is visible and it is your garment.
Hear me, you hearers
and learn of my words, you who know me.
I am the hearing that is attainable to everything;
I am the speech that cannot be grasped.
I am the name of the sound
and the sound of the name.
I am the sign of the letter
and the designation of the division.
And I […].
(3 lines missing)
[…] light […].
[…] hearers […] to you
[…] the great power.
And […] will not move the name.
[…] to the one who created me.
And I will speak his name.

Look then at his words
and all the writings which have been completed.
Give heed then, you hearers
and you also, the angels and those who have been sent,
and you spirits who have arisen from the dead.
For I am the one who alone exists,
and I have no one who will judge me.
For many are the pleasant forms which exist in numerous sins,
and incontinencies,
and disgraceful passions,
and fleeting pleasures,
which (men) embrace until they become sober
and go up to their resting place.
And they will find me there,
and they will live,
and they will not die again.


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